Do you know a woman who might be subjected to violence from her partner, ex-partner or family? And you are in doubt about what you should do?
As a relative, you can make a big difference. It is, therefore, both important and right for you to interfere if you are witness to something that is not okay. Particularly if children are involved.
We have gathered the most important information for relatives.
It is not easy to walk away
As a relative, you must understand that it is not easy for the victim to leave the person who is perpetrating the violence. This is due to several things:
For many victims of violence, the violence has become a normal part of their daily lives. Therefore, it is not certain that they feel they are being subjected to violence. It is also quite normal to feel that it is your own fault or to be ashamed. Often, there is also love in the relationship, and good periods, when you hope and believe that things will get better. Maybe you have children together, which can make it extra hard to walk away. Some women are really afraid of what might happen if they leave.
Talk about it
As a family member, you can make a difference by talking with the woman about your concerns.
This is what you can do:
- Find a time when things are calm, and the children are not around. Ask her how she is doing. Speak clearly about the violence and share your concern with her.
- If the woman starts to speak, then listen to her. Avoid giving good advice immediately or blaming her for not leaving. Acknowledge that it is a big decision and try to listen openly and caringly.
- If the woman does not want to talk about it, then tell her that you are there for her and are ready to help her.
- Tell her that violence is never okay, and that it is never her fault.
- Help the woman in her daily life as much as you can. You could, for instance, drop by with food, help with the housecleaning or offer to take care of the kids for a few hours.
We can help you
It may feel like a big responsibility to be the relative of someone who is being subjected to violence.
Contact us and tell us what you have seen or heard. We can help you find out if the woman has been exposed to violence and what you, as her relative, can do. You can call us 24/7 and be anonymous.
If there is an urgent need for assistance (police or ambulance), you should always call 112. If you wish to report a case of violence, you should call 114.
If there are children, you must respond
It is harmful for children to grow up with violence. Do you know, or have a suspicion about a child who is a victim of violence or is having to live with violence? If so, it is your duty to report it to the authorities.
If you are not sure whether you should make a report, then contact ForældreTelefonen at Børns Vilkår.
If you want to inform the authorities, you must contact the municipality the child lives in.